Going Up?

A wise friend once told me that what she loved about living in New York City was the range of emotions she experienced every day. She should have moved into Duke hospital.

Today, after a lovely lunch in the cafeteria (just kidding) I walked past an XXL family, with kids in tow, slouching towards the elevator. We all climbed aboard, and as the elevator doors closed, a security guard rushed over and thrust his arm out, reopening the doors.

“Sorry folks. No kids allowed upstairs in the hospital.”

It’s true. Owen hasn’t seen Errol for two weeks. We even told security Owen was a 40 year-old midget with a close shave, but it didn’t work. We’ll try the old catapult next time.

The mother protested her child being bounced from the hospital, “But they let him in yesterday!” She protested.

Now, when you stop and think about it, the old ‘but I broke the rules before’ argument is pretty lame. “But officer, I killed yesterday!”

Which, of course, doesn’t stop me from using that argument myself. In fact, it worked nicely in the Ronald McDonald Room yesterday! Besides, I hadn't rollerbladed all week!

“That’s the rules, folks.” Said the guard.

“But his daddy’s terminal! He's not gonna last long!” Cried the boy’s mother.

“That’s the rules, folks.” Repeated the guard. And remember, when in doubt, say it again, and that's just what that guard did.

"That's the rules, folks." And the family got off the elevator, and, as far as I know, the boy didn’t get to see his dad.

Later, I saw a mother wheel her newborn son out of the hospital. How they got those wheels on that baby, I’ll never know but they sure were movin'! The mother and father were so proud. So full of love. Just starting out. The baby looked pissed. It was 40 degrees (just a wee big colder than inside mommy's belly.

That afternoon, a grinning man got on the elevator and asked all of us how we were doing. We all froze. What did he really want? Was he going to sell us something, start shooting, yodel???? Luckily, he didn’t yodel. Of course, the reason he asked us how we were doing was so we would ask how he was doing. Which is why sad people (and bears, for that matter) don’t ask elevators full of people how they are doing. They don’t want to be asked themselves.

But the category-five grinner wanted to be asked. No one wanted to be the one. To fall further into this intereview in reverse. But we still had at lest hree floors to go (if the elevator didn't stall, the hospital run out of power, and the seven of us test BMIs until we could decide which one to eat first. Arghhhh! So before we went down that road (that's where I live, by the way) soon enough someone begrudgingly obliged.

And how are you doing today?

He didn't have to think about his answer whic he gave full throated answer like a meuzzin leading a prayer.

"I'm so glad to be alive!" You don't hear that a lot, by the wasy, out in civilian world, its not the first time Iv'e heard it at Duke. It;s not the first time I've said it. So who was this man: cancer survivor? Now father? Owner of the patent to the Zhu Zhu pets? Whoer he was, he was alive, and he was happy. And we were too, at least for a moment. Even those of us who were sleep-deprived, hungry, sad, terrified, just a little gassy(sorry, crew), depressed, anguished. At least, just for a moment we all felt all of his joy coursing through our ears and eyes and bodies. Then the doors to the fifth floor opened and I headed off to Errol.

I ought to ride those elevators more often. Sometimes they go up, and sometimes they go down, but no matter what, they are always moving.

Whatever you do, just don’t get off on 0!